Thursday, November 27, 2008
Slade.
Wham.
The Pogues.
Mariah Carey.
Paul McCartney.
Cliff Richard.
Need I say more?
Christmas songs are to music what cyanide is to orange juice.
And yes, that does include Phil Spector songs.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
In a super sexy pre-budget sneaky peek, the Government hit the headlines with their new looks for Spring/Summer 2009.
The house of Darling hinted at luxurious hemlines, with VAT slashed right down to 15% for the next thirteen months. The fashion giant obviously hopes this will lead to a hike in high heels, claiming it [...]
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Aren’t hangovers wonderful?
As I am feeling incapable of typing just at the moment, I shall leave you with this, perfect description of a hangover by Kingsley Amis in Lucky Jim:
Dixon was alive again. Consciousness was upon him before he could get out of the way; not for him the slow, gracious wandering from the halls [...]
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
There are few things in this world more loathsome than the sight of the misogynistic, gutter-slurping hell-hole that is Peter Stringfellow, airing his gut on a beach in a drooping leopard print thong. But the sight of him in the House of Commons, talking to the elected representatives of our nation is just that bit [...]
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
The food.
Not so much what you have to eat – although whoever thought that much preserved fruit was a good idea is insane – but rather the atomic stress levels that are created when three generations of any family try to cook an enormous meal for more than three people.
Give me a coal shed, a [...]
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
A gravy-stained, unsupported man boob is about as unwelcome at the festive dinner table as Herod himself. So thank your lucky man mammaries that those whizz kids at Wish Room have pulled up their adjustable bra straps and created the ‘Man Bra’, available this season for a mere 2800 Yen.
Quite who this innovation in [...]
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Or ‘Vice’ as it’s known.
Check me out at
http://vice.typepad.com/vice_magazine/2008/11/london—slacki.html#more
(I’m sure there’s a more sophisticated way to insert these links, but hey)
Monday, November 24, 2008
Just as if motherhood wasn’t stressful enough (and I’ve heard cracked nipples aren’t exactly a roll in the hay) Imperial College London have brought out some research showing that hairspray is basically the new asbestos.
Uh huh, according to the study, women who are regularly exposed to hairspray are more than twice as likely to have babies [...]
Monday, November 24, 2008
The wild panic-stricken state in which you buy a set of four heavy, ugly, brass candlesticks, a spotty teapot, a necklace and some bath salts in the hope that someone, somewhere will want them as a present. Whilst in your heart if hearts, knowing that they won’t.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Posing.
The facial equivalent of throwing your dirty washing in the oven when guests are coming round – things might look better for a second, but you can’t hide the fetid truth for long.
The world of posing has taken on a whole new momentum with the introduction of Facebook. Click through your friends’ photos right now [...]